ANGER
I lose my temper, but its all over in a minute," said the student. "So is the hydrogen bomb," I replied. "But think of the damage it produces!" George Sweeting
The Problem
What makes you angry?
Occasionally we become angry for a righteous cause, but ninety- nine percent of the time we become angry because we are selfish and impatient.
I have never lost my temper at the office -- I would never want my colleagues to think I couldn't control myself.
Rarely a week goes by in which the sparks of family life don't provide good tinder for a roaring fire of anger.
Three Angry Men:
Freddie Flash. His anger is a frequency problem.
Cary Control. His anger is an intensity problem.
Gary Grudge. His anger is a duration problem.
What Makes Us Angry That Shouldn't:
Violation of rights.
Disappointment with station in life.
Blocked goals.
Irritations.
Feeling misunderstood.
Unrealistic expectations.
Pathological/Psychological.
Responding to Anger:
Keep control. "A fool gives vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control." Proverbs 29:11
Overlook offenses. "A man's wisdom gives him patience; but it is to his glory to overlook an offense." Proverbs 19:11
Avoid angry men. "Do not make friends with a hot tempered man, do not associate with one easily angered, or you may learn his ways and get yourself ensnared." Proverbs 22:24-25
Appease anger. "A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger." Proverbs 15:1
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Man in the Mirror, chapter 17 summary
FEAR
The only thing we have to fear is fear itself. -Franklin Delano Roosevelt
The Problem
What do you fear? Failure? Rejection? Sudden disaster? Men?
Courage is the state of mind that allows one to face hardship or disaster with confidence and resolution.
Fear is the agitated state of mind that cripples us from looking any farther than the hardship itself.
To be afraid is not to fully trust God.
The Cycle of Fear
Step 1. Reality.
Step 2. Response.
Step 3. Result.
Step 4. Return.
Step 5. Rescue.
Godly Fear versus Secular Fear
Men have the power to give us what we don't deserve, or to withhold from us what we do deserve.
God has the power to give us what we do deserve, or to withhold from us what we don't deserve.
Four Steps to Overcome Fear
Step 1. Unbundle our emotions.
Step 2. Exercise faith in the sovereignty of God.
Step 3. Submit our circumstances and attitude to God.
Step 4. Wait patiently for God to act.
The only thing we have to fear is fear itself. -Franklin Delano Roosevelt
The Problem
What do you fear? Failure? Rejection? Sudden disaster? Men?
Courage is the state of mind that allows one to face hardship or disaster with confidence and resolution.
Fear is the agitated state of mind that cripples us from looking any farther than the hardship itself.
To be afraid is not to fully trust God.
The Cycle of Fear
Step 1. Reality.
Step 2. Response.
Step 3. Result.
Step 4. Return.
Step 5. Rescue.
Godly Fear versus Secular Fear
Men have the power to give us what we don't deserve, or to withhold from us what we do deserve.
God has the power to give us what we do deserve, or to withhold from us what we don't deserve.
Four Steps to Overcome Fear
Step 1. Unbundle our emotions.
Step 2. Exercise faith in the sovereignty of God.
Step 3. Submit our circumstances and attitude to God.
Step 4. Wait patiently for God to act.
Monday, May 18, 2009
Man in the Mirror Summary, chapter 16
PRIDE
"I am the greatest. Not only do I knock 'em out, I pick the round!" Muhammad Ali
The Problem
Men want and need to feel good about themselves.
Pride is a sin of comparison in which we compare our strengths to the other fellow's weaknesses.
Two Types of Pride
Pride Type 1. Rather than testing our self worth by comparison to others, we are encouraged to self-examination.
Pride Type 2. A feeling of superiority brought about by looking down on others.
Two Types of Humility
Humility Type 1. Not thinking more highly of yourself than you ought.
Humility Type 2. Thinking too lowly of yourself. Self- deprecation.
Keeping the Right Balance
We don't look down on others, but we have tested our actions, and take pride without comparing ourself to others.
We don't think more highly of ourselves than we ought to, but we soberly think well of ourselves.
Sources of Pride
Too much success can cause us to forget who and what we are.
A man who does not fear God becomes so proud that he cannot detect his own sinfulness.
We put a great deal of effort into making ourselves feel important.
Symptoms
One symptom of pride is a dead giveaway -- constant critiquing of others.
Another is blindness to the needs of others.
Unwillingness to associate with people of lower position is yet another symptom.
"I am the greatest. Not only do I knock 'em out, I pick the round!" Muhammad Ali
The Problem
Men want and need to feel good about themselves.
Pride is a sin of comparison in which we compare our strengths to the other fellow's weaknesses.
Two Types of Pride
Pride Type 1. Rather than testing our self worth by comparison to others, we are encouraged to self-examination.
Pride Type 2. A feeling of superiority brought about by looking down on others.
Two Types of Humility
Humility Type 1. Not thinking more highly of yourself than you ought.
Humility Type 2. Thinking too lowly of yourself. Self- deprecation.
Keeping the Right Balance
We don't look down on others, but we have tested our actions, and take pride without comparing ourself to others.
We don't think more highly of ourselves than we ought to, but we soberly think well of ourselves.
Sources of Pride
Too much success can cause us to forget who and what we are.
A man who does not fear God becomes so proud that he cannot detect his own sinfulness.
We put a great deal of effort into making ourselves feel important.
Symptoms
One symptom of pride is a dead giveaway -- constant critiquing of others.
Another is blindness to the needs of others.
Unwillingness to associate with people of lower position is yet another symptom.
Friday, May 1, 2009
"Man in the Mirror" "No Man Left Behind"
A preliminary dinner will be held for those interested in knowing more about the "No Man Left Behind" training sponsored by Man in the Mirror ministry. The dinner, dutch treat, will be at 6:30 p.m., May 28 at Captain's Galley, 1261 16th St. SE, Hickory, NC 28601, 828/327-0555. RSVP to gregwilkinson@maninthemirror.org with a copy to me at brownneil@bellsouth.net. All men and especially pastors from any and all denominations are invited to attend.More info at www.maninthemirror.org.
Newsletter link
For the May 2009 Marion District United Methodist Men newsletter go to:
http://www.mynewsletterbuilder.com/tools/view_newsletter.php?newsletter_id=1409879841
http://www.mynewsletterbuilder.com/tools/view_newsletter.php?newsletter_id=1409879841
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
Man in the Mirror, Chapter 14 Summary
Priorities: How to Decide What's Important
The constant desire to have still more things and a still better life and the struggle to obtain them imprints many Western faces with worry and even depression, though it is customary to conceal such feelings. Alexander Solzhenitsyn
The Problem
Most men have not settled the issue of what their priorities should be. Among those who do know, too few live according to those priorities.
Perhaps no other time of the week reveals more about us than how we spend Saturday morning. Saturday is like the discretionary income in our paycheck.
How do you spend your Saturdays?
Most men are more task oriented than relationship oriented. Lets look at relationships first, the area where we are usually the weakest.
Biblical Priorities
Our top priority: "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength" Matthew 22:36,37. The most practical way to demonstrate our love for God is through obedience which includes:
Bible Study
Prayer
Worship
Sharing
The man in the mirror can do nothing better than look intently into the word of God that gives freedom and discover the principles, precepts, and guidelines offered.
Priority number two: "Love your neighbor as yourself" Matthew 22:39. Our spouse, children, and parents should be highest on the list of "neighbors". God thinks so highly of our relationship with our parents that He made it one of the Ten Commandments.
Another priority is rest. Our emphasis is always on doing, but God is interested in our rest.
Work should also be a priority. The purpose of work is to glorify God with the abilities He has given us. This should motivate us to pursue excellence.
A final priority is good works which includes:
Introducing others to Christ.
Helping others learn about and become like Christ.
Caring for the poor and needy.
The constant desire to have still more things and a still better life and the struggle to obtain them imprints many Western faces with worry and even depression, though it is customary to conceal such feelings. Alexander Solzhenitsyn
The Problem
Most men have not settled the issue of what their priorities should be. Among those who do know, too few live according to those priorities.
Perhaps no other time of the week reveals more about us than how we spend Saturday morning. Saturday is like the discretionary income in our paycheck.
How do you spend your Saturdays?
Most men are more task oriented than relationship oriented. Lets look at relationships first, the area where we are usually the weakest.
Biblical Priorities
Our top priority: "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength" Matthew 22:36,37. The most practical way to demonstrate our love for God is through obedience which includes:
Bible Study
Prayer
Worship
Sharing
The man in the mirror can do nothing better than look intently into the word of God that gives freedom and discover the principles, precepts, and guidelines offered.
Priority number two: "Love your neighbor as yourself" Matthew 22:39. Our spouse, children, and parents should be highest on the list of "neighbors". God thinks so highly of our relationship with our parents that He made it one of the Ten Commandments.
Another priority is rest. Our emphasis is always on doing, but God is interested in our rest.
Work should also be a priority. The purpose of work is to glorify God with the abilities He has given us. This should motivate us to pursue excellence.
A final priority is good works which includes:
Introducing others to Christ.
Helping others learn about and become like Christ.
Caring for the poor and needy.
Friday, April 3, 2009
Link to Newsletter
The March 2009 Marion District United Methodist Men's newsletter is here:
http://www.mynewsletterbuilder.com/tools/view_newsletter.php?newsletter_id=1409876677
http://www.mynewsletterbuilder.com/tools/view_newsletter.php?newsletter_id=1409876677
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